Tuesday, July 20, 2004

Since I've decided to stop blogging...

I am having a very serious problem.

I have two companies wanting to interview me. We haven't been able to coordinate schedules... and I don't feel like making one more phone call. One of them could be a real opportunity - still not doing what I love, but the money will be good and my commute will disappear.

Basically I'm faced with the option of a shitty job with a shitty commute (which I have now) versus a shitty job with no commute (the possibles). I feel completely uninspired and unmotivated to go that extra mile trying to get the new job and get this life-limiting commute out of my schedule. Because I will still be wasting 8-9 hours a day doing crap that I don't like.

So many people are stuck with this dilemma. I'm finding myself completely mired down in it right now. Add to this scenario opera rehearsals three nights a week - I'm exhausted. Right now all I want to do is take the path of least resistance... which leads, as we all know, to nowhere but death.

Why is it that NOW, after two years of trying to get noticed, I'm finally getting noticed and am so exhausted and jaded that I can see myself letting it all slip through my fingers? I always tell others that it's never too late... but I feel immobilized.

I don't know what to do with myself anymore. This must be a temporary slump I'm going through. I'm sure once the concert is over I'll be back behind the plate ready to swing.

But will the pitchers have all gone home?

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