Tuesday, October 03, 2006

She was afraid to come out in the open...

I've got a teeny-weeny itsy-bitsy yellow polka-dot bit of faith in the universe. So in my emotional cocoon I'm going to stay. For awhile. From here I can see that good things are happening to people around me, which helps. Sort of.

Actually, that's not quite right.

Writing these days is like trying to watch TV without cable. I keep moving the rabbit ears, but I can't get a clear enough picture of what's going on, so I don't know how to talk about anything. And I'm sick of posting my angst. Reading my past entries, I wonder why MzOuiser doesn't just jump off a bridge if she's so damn miserable. She's disgusting me.

The year-long Work Phase I've been moving through ends in less than five weeks. I have senioritis, and want to start doing other things NOW. Like singing, writing, making trips into Manhattan, enjoying clothes. Too soon for any of that. I'm going to try and wrench my focus back where it needs to be. Pathology test every Wednesday. Shiatsu tests every Monday. Clinic every Saturday morning. Classes and a case study to complete in between.

Just keep swimming, just keep swimming...

2 comments:

Judy said...

It will be over soon enough, and it sounds like even though you've gone through a hell of a lot, you've made it through relatively well.

Wayne said...

Yeah. I sceond Judy's comment. :)