My "Mondo Beyondo" list:

From his blog: a list of things to do in 2005 that are completely outrageous, over-the-top, completely unlikely, and yet a hell of a lot of fun to think about.

1. I will sing along with more street musicians. In harmony.

2. I will be interviewed by Sassy Pat Kiernan on New York 1. I will henceforth be known as "the Subway Soprano" or "Tebaldi of the Trains" some such lame network moniker.

3. As soon as the cameras are off, he and I will disappear into the news van and make that sucker shake.

4. With laughter, after he remembers he's gay. I'll tell him this happens all the time, and that we'll always have 14th Street.

5. Due to my newfound fame as the Downtown Diva, my blog will get thousands of hits a day.

6. A publishing company will contact me and offer a large advance for my Friday-to-Sunday Memoirs.

7. This will sell so well that I'll finally get my other novel finished and published, along with my canon of poetry, volume of short stories, and the play I wrote in college.

8. The CD I record will not hit the billboards, but it's tracks will be the most requested songs at every karaoke bar in the country.

9. I'll pay off my student loan, my divorce attorney, my MasterCard, and the rest of my parent's house. In that order.

10. I'll buy a house overlooking the Chesapeake Bay, cut my hair short, marry my boyfriend, and start life all over again with a huge kitchen, my cat, and my Grandpa's piano.

Ok, maybe I won't cut my hair. But the rest is good.