Me: He had this thing he used to do...
Friend: Do I want to know this?
Me: No, it was cute! He used to make this bear sound. You know the Coca-Cola Polar Bears?
Friend: Like in the commercial?
Me: Yeah. He had this really resonant, rumbly voice, and he could make that sound just perfect, exactly like those bears!
Me: Yes! I used to go up to him and lay my head against his chest, and we'd hug, and I'd say "Make the Bear sound!"
Me: And this amazing rumble would come up from the depths of the earth, all warm and fuzzy and deep.
Friend: And then what?
Me: And then... I'd feel safe. And happy.
Friend: That's nice.
Me: You know how I'm always saying a shot of good scotch feels like a hug from your dad?
Me: It was like that. But better, because it came with an actual hug. And he'd look down at me and smile, and for a few seconds, everything was perfect.
Today, my ex-husband turns 40. For ten years, he has been a part of my life, even though we fell out of touch over the last two years, which is natural after a divorce. He is out there, living his life as best he can, just as I am. For all the badness we lived through, we had some good times too, and at the end of the day, those are the strongest memories of all.
Happy Birthday Dimarc, wherever you are.