Sak's Fifth Avenue: Bridal Salon, may I help you?
Me: Yes, I'd like to make an appointment.
SFA: When is your wedding?
Me: One year from this week - February 16th, 2008.
SFA: So, are you not interested in our 2008 collections?
Me: I'm open to anything, I'm just getting started.
SFA: Well, do you know our designers we carry?
Me: I'm on your website, but I don't see a list of designers...
SFA: If you go to the Knot, they should be listed there.
Me: The knot...?
SFA: Are there any designers you're particularly interested in?
Me: (wracking my brain to come up with a name or two) Well, I've liked some gowns from Watters, and Demetrios, and...
SFA: We don't carry those designers.
Me: But, really, I'm open to anything, I have plenty of time...
SFA: We carry a higher price point here.
SFA: Demetrios doesn't sell anywhere in New York. If you want to see Watters, those are only available at Macy's. You'll have to go there.
SFA: Yes, only Macy's.
Me: I have to call Macy's?
SFA: Yes, Watters sells to their bridal salons only.
Me: That's... not what I expected to hear.
SFA: And why not?
Me: (because I can't believe you're not interested in taking my money for yourself?) Well... I really hate shopping at Macy's.
SFA: Nonsense! Macy's is a lovely store. We don't carry the gowns you want.
Me: Fine then. Thanks anyway.
SFA: (brightly) Of course, you're welcome dear!
Me: I have $2500 budgeted for this dress, you elitist snobby bitch.
(I checked out Macy's, more commonly referred to as the ghetto trash department store from hell. They only have three bridal salons in the entire country: Chicago, Minneapolis, and Troy, MI.)